Because there is something inside of me that makes me say these things at the precise moment I wish I hadn't

Why do long weekends go by even faster than regular ones? Now THAT, that's not fair. At least I had the chance to get out ond have go ol' hometown fun and go shopping with Amanda. You know, going around from store to store. "Oh that's cute, I like that! Those jeans are so cute, Everything is SO CUTE! Try those on, they're cute." It's not a wonder our husbands don't like to join us on our shopping excursions. One can only take a few hundred uses of the word "cute" before complete meltdown.
Well, we decided to end our mall raid with a trip to Starbuck for the classic Caramel Frappuccino of the light variety because then one doesn't have to feel quite as guilty about having them put extra caramel smothered inside and on top of the decadent beverage. It all makes sense in my brain anyways. Then of course we had to go to London Drugs and slobber over the amazing SLR digital cameras they have there. As we were approaching the electronics section I was musing to Amanda about the competence, or rather lack thereof, of the guy they had working behind the counter last time I went there.
"...he didn't know what the heck he was talking about. I mean seriously, if they're going to hire someone to help you pick out a good camera, he should at least know how to operate the basic functions. Like ON and OFF. And he didn't even know that they made a SLR digital Canon Rebel."
No sooner had I spewed this nonsensical, presumptive, slander from my unkind lips did i turn and find myself face to face with the very same incompetent salesman I'd been slandering.
"It's the Canon Rebel you'd like to see is it?"
"yeah, thanks....'
AAAAHHH, I'm SUCH an IDIOT! Needless to say, it's taken me awhile for anything to taste the same; there's still the faintest touch of a stinking foot in my gums and on the back of my tongue.